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Fun with Nike (fwd)
Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny
From: [email protected] (Dr. Ram Samudrala)
Subject: Fun with Nike
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: Tue, 13 Mar 2001 19:30:00 PST
>From: [email protected]
>Newsgroups: alt.consumers,alt.consumers.experiences,misc.consumers
>Subject: Fun with Nike
>Date: Wed, 21 Feb 2001 19:51:51 -0800
Nike now lets you personalize your shoes by submitting a word or phrase
which they will stitch onto your shoes, under the swoosh. So Jonah
Peretti filled out the form and sent them $50 to stitch "sweatshop"
onto his shoes.
Here's the responses he got.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
>From: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>To: "'Jonah H. Peretti'" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Your NIKE iD order was cancelled for one or more of the following
reasons:
1) Your Personal iD contains another party's trademark or other
intellectual property
2) Your Personal iD contains the name of an athlete or team we do not
have the legal right to use
3) Your Personal iD was left blank. Did you not want any
personalization?
4) Your Personal iD contains profanity or inappropriate slang, and
besides, your mother would slap us.
If you wish to reorder your NIKE iD product with a new personalization
please visit us again at www.nike.com
Thank you, NIKE iD
>From: "Jonah H. Peretti" <[email protected]>
>To: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Greetings,
My order was canceled but my personal NIKE iD does not violate any of
the criteria outlined in your message. The Personal iD on my custom
ZOOM XC USA running shoes was the word "sweatshop."
Sweatshop is not: 1) another's party's trademark, 2) the name of an
athlete, 3) blank, or 4) profanity.
I choose the iD because I wanted to remember the toil and labor of the
children that made my shoes. Could you please ship them to me
immediately.
Thanks and Happy New Year, Jonah Peretti
>From: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>To: "'Jonah H. Peretti'" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Dear NIKE iD Customer,
Your NIKE iD order was cancelled because the iD you have chosen
contains, as stated in the previous e-mail correspondence,
"inappropriate slang". If you wish to reorder your NIKE iD product with
a new personalization please visit us again at nike.com
Thank you, NIKE iD
>From: "Jonah H. Peretti" <[email protected]>
>To: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Dear NIKE iD,
Thank you for your quick response to my inquiry about my custom ZOOM XC
USA running shoes. Although I commend you for your prompt customer
service, I disagree with the claim that my personal iD was
inappropriate slang. After consulting Webster's Dictionary, I
discovered that "sweatshop" is in fact part of standard English, and
not slang. The word means: "a shop or factory in which workers are
employed for long hours at low wages and under unhealthy conditions"
and its origin dates from 1892. So my personal iD does meet the
criteria detailed in your first email.
Your web site advertises that the NIKE iD program is "about freedom to
choose and freedom to express who you are." I share Nike's love of
freedom and personal expression. The site also says that "If you want
it done right...build it yourself." I was thrilled to be able to build
my own shoes, and my personal iD was offered as a small token of
appreciation for the sweatshop workers poised to help me realize my
vision. I hope that you will value my freedom of expression and
reconsider your decision to reject my order.
Thank you, Jonah Peretti
>From: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>To: "'Jonah H. Peretti'" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Dear NIKE iD Customer,
Regarding the rules for personalization it also states on the NIKE iD
web site that "Nike reserves the right to cancel any personal iD> >up
to 24 hours after it has been submitted". In addition, it further
explains: "While we honor most personal iDs, we cannot honor every one.
Some may be (or contain) other's trademarks, or the names of certain
professional sports teams, athletes or celebrities that Nike does not
have the right to use. Others may contain material that we consider
inappropriate or simply do not want to place on our products.
Unfortunately, at times this obliges us to decline personal iDs that
may otherwise seem unobjectionable. In any event, we will let you know
if we decline your personal iD, and we will offer you the chance to
submit another." With these rules in mind, we cannot accept your order
as submitted. If you wish to reorder your NIKE iD product with a new
personalization please visit us again at www.nike.com
Thank you, NIKE iD
>From: "Jonah H. Peretti" <[email protected]>
>To: "Personalize, NIKE iD" <[email protected]>
>Subject: RE: Your NIKE iD order o16468000
Dear NIKE iD,
Thank you for the time and energy you have spent on my request. I have
decided to order the shoes with a different iD, but I would like to
make one small request. Could you please send me a color snapshot of
the ten-year-old Vietnamese girl who makes my shoes?
Thanks, Jonah Peretti
<no response>
As one forwarder writes:
... this will now go round the world much farther and faster than any
of the adverts they paid Michael Jordan more than the entire wage
packet of all their sweatshop workers in the world to do...
I normally avoid making a plea to pass on these things, but this time I
say:
JUST DO IT
[Posted with permission of one of the authors.]
--
Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to [email protected].
The offensive jokes policy is at http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/offensive.html
This joke's link: http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/01/Mar/sweatshop.html
--
Matthew Hunt <[email protected]> * What do you want?
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